From this NYT Op-Ed about the state of relationships in the “tech” era. Makes some good points, but ultimately, I think our generation just uses technology differently and has different attitudes toward sex and relationships.
The idea that sex is something to be withheld to build trust and delay a relationship built on short-term desire seems a little puritanical to me.
People once lived within a pattern of being, which educated the emotions, guided the temporary toward the permanent and linked everyday urges to higher things. The accumulated wisdom of the community steered couples as they tried to earn each other’s commitment.
Today there are fewer norms that guide in that way. Today’s technology seems to threaten the sort of recurring and stable reciprocity that is the building block of trust.
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